I am not going to put pictures with this explanation. I don’t need to. I won’t. I tweeted a few things last night. When I woke up this morning, I just nodded that maybe I needed an explanation for what I tweeted.
Sometimes, I believe that happens. My husband and I have been childless at our house for all of the 15 years of our marriage. We are on week four this coming Saturday morning for our foster parent training, here in Tampa. We go until the last part of September. And all I can think about is how I am going to approach the HARPIES.
What in the world are the Harpies? I can give an example. I can try to give an example in a nice way. I don’t like stupid comments from parents or when adults with kids who gather without them. I don’t like people who show their lack of education. I can’t stand it, plain and simple. I don’t DON’T KNOW IT ALL. But I can’t stand ignorance. I can’t stand pettiness and those who go on and on about things that are obvious.
But at a recent couples only gathering last school year, all the parents did was talk about their kids. I mean, they gossiped about menial parent stuff. If I had kids and all of the common sense I have now and intend to keep when we are placed,
I would never EVER EVER DO THAT. It is none of their business what my kids do. It is none of my business what their kids do. I was sitting there with a growing stalk of bad impressions. It was turning into a giant Jack in the Beanstalk vine of bad impressions. Hey, I am not a know it all, but since I didn’t know any of these people, it was not something I would even think of talking about when I don’t know people. It is not something you make small talk about when you are standing there introducing yourself.
I mean here we are on week four this week. We have about a month to go. Believe me, I am never going to “Mommy blog” or “Foster Mommy blog”. I can’t. It is against the law. You cannot even think about mentioning any details of kids on social media. Ok, I am fine with that. But even before we are placed, I am going to have to mention that our city , Tampa is a very nice place for the most part. But there are spot of parents who shoot their mouths off and show a lack of social skills.
I am not going to be into talking about my children, no matter what they are. I am 50 and do not remember my parents ever doing that with people I barely knew or were making small talk about for any reason whatsoever. Before we are placed, there is the question of race and other differences.
I love that movie, “On the Blind Side.”
Some of these people at church and other circles are not NOT FROM New York. I am originally. I have lived here since 1970. They are from the Sugar Ditch towns of the Deep South. They would never survive in the New York City or Long Island. That’s where I am really from and I want them to remember it. I may have been here for 40 years, but we New Yorkers have a subculture down here that thrives on our own pizza that is large and bigger than a Suburban or the back seat of one that you haven’t paid for YET.
Our Northeastern subculture world in Florida is bigger than trying to impress one’s friends in South Carolina or Alabama or the back hills of Tennessee with a house in Florida that you cannot afford and are working three jobs and are living week to week to try to afford. Most of these people have only a half an education of the whole they were trying to get. Football and booze and sorority and fraternity became more important than finishing what Mommy or Daddy sent them to college to do. So now they have to live the rest of their lives trying to get over it.
Can you get what I said here? I have watched people like this come and go for 35 years. They leave in about every 4 years or sooner when they cannot make it here. Most are in Sales or work for their cousin, who is a developer or in construction or real estate. I love recessions because they leave. It is quiet when they leave.
I have to write the truth before the kids come. Whew, there I wrote it.
This is how about 20 to 30 percent of them are in the neighborhood where I live. The other 70 percent doesn’t give a spot what anyone thinks. The 70 percent are from other northern places like me. About another 40 percent of that 70 percent has been here a while and all have theme park passes they carry. We keep walking and laugh at them. Maybe I need to remind these people of that. I cannot get into their petty stuff and do not wish to do so. I am going to remind them that my world and any child who comes to live with us is going to be enriched with a bigger world. He or she is going to be very welcome in every way. They have gone through enough in their young lives.
I used to be one of them. I was very small when I was in foster. I understand.
Maybe I need to write an unpublished non social media book about the whole experience. Maybe I need to write a play about it all and save it for when I am 65 or 70.
But these kids are going to be very welcome. No matter how much time they spend with us, I have waited forever. I am going to enjoy every moment of this.
I just have a very low tolerance for stupid. I have a very low tolerance for gossip that is petty. If I cannot use any social media, I will go old school and save all of it and the whole of it for a play in the stupid people’s honor.
Shine on. And it is not going to look good when you do. Some actor or actress one day will be getting a lot of applause when they play you.